The beginning of my counselling journey

I remember the first time I felt like a counsellor, when I was 12 years old. It was in Grade 6 during a training seminar for aspiring peer supporters, where we were taught how to protect and mentor vulnerable students. I relished it all. Helping students who were struggling socially to connect and find hope felt natural, like breathing, an automatic and inherently rewarding reflex.

The adventures of youth and young adulthood led me down a different path, providing the life experiences that support my counselling training. I earned a degree in music and afterward enjoyed a successful career in retail. My degree taught me something of the art of living by studying art itself, while perhaps the benefit of my retail career was that it taught me the art of diplomacy (I jokingly call my retail career my first counselling degree)!

Still, my core passion and nature remained, and eventually led me back to where it began- the desire to help alleviate others’ suffering. Happily, it’s here to stay.

My passion for being present

It’s happened so many times in my life: a friend or a stranger confides in me for a few minutes, or ten, or longer, and they spontaneously unburden their soul.

I know they do it because I naturally make them feel at ease. I’m not scared of pain. Partly by nature, partly by practice, I lean into the experience of suffering they share. I let myself feel compassion for them.

This skill has been honed over a decade of customer service and a daily mindfulness practice that spans longer, but at its core are the qualities that motivated me at that youth peer support seminar- curiosity and resilience. I was leaning in at 12 years old, too.

My mental health journey

My neurodivergence and the conflict and alienation it entailed were at least one reason why I signed up to be a peer supporter: they were a way for me to help myself by helping others. In my way, I understood their pain. Such compassion has made me intensely loyal to my circle of friends and family, and I count on the same loyalty in return.

Given’s loyalty’s a core value of mine, so it’s no surprise that when my boss shockingly violated it in 2017, after almost uniformly positive relationships with bosses, he traumatized me. Trauma is “merely” an experience that disproves your worldview, in part or entirely: a simple definition with crushing emotional consequences. Until then, I had only ever trusted and admired my bosses, so when he tormented and humiliated me repeatedly, it shattered all my ideas about myself, others, and the world.

I- messily- escaped from my work situation, but my troubles had just begun. Living with PTSD symptoms, I entered counselling, and for several years, tried multiple counsellors and multiple styles with no success. The problem was simple: I felt there wasn’t enough space for me to be me. To put my pain into my words. To decide what was wrong, if anything, with me rather than accept a therapist’s projected pigeonhole and dismissal of me.

I knew I could do better, and this represents my core mission with every client.

Looking back, I can declare with pride that I am on a healing journey, and that neither my boss nor the trauma he inflicted haunts me. I’m human, though, and my life isn’t without challenges. A benefit of my journey is that I now know myself much better. I have new passions, such as making playlists, photography (all of the photos here are mine unless indicated), and martial arts, which make my life deeply meaningful. As a result of my journey, a core passion of my work is helping clients discover what makes their lives vibrant and meaningful to them.

My skills

I work continually to improve my skills by taking workshops and attending conferences. Regularly, I draw from three sources of new information:

Workshops and clinical meetings with other counsellors. Learning from other professionals helps add their perspective to my own. My expanding perspective enables me to listen and respond to my clients with greater openness, curiosity, and clarity. As a result, I help clients feel more confident and reassured in our work.
My Master’s Degree in Counselling Psychology. Outside of personal therapy, nothing contributed to my personal growth more than my counselling degree. I revisit the books and ideas I encountered there to reflect on how I can improve my work with my clients. I show that, as a human being, I’m growing, too, and my clients can feel more connected in our work.
Palliative Care. I volunteer weekly in support of patients who have a terminal illness, offering informal chats, quiet company, and refreshments. During my visits, as I practice the relational skills core to my counselling work, I hear stories of grief, hope, and the patient’s connection to loved ones. I learn to lean in even more, allowing my clients to share their stories of grief, hope, and connection, bringing them relief.

Are you ready to tell me your story?

Click the “Book Here” button below to schedule a complimentary 20-minute inquiry call, during which we can discuss how the wisdom I’ve gained from my personal journey can support you on yours.